Question
.....just hit my mailbox.....everybody holding their breath with anticipation???
Its a ONE CENT SALE....for TWO days.....March 22nd & 23rd!
But it is just for subtitles
But you $ave 49 cents for each one you use....and we ALL use them don't we???
The only way it would be any MORE obvious that they are having to do everything they can to pump up the numbers before the quarter ends next week, would be if they took out an ad in the Wall Street Journal.
Maybe NEXT Tuesday they will run a "buy one ad...get one free~~rebated in 180 days if you have a store and use bold in all auctions" sale!???!
Answer
I saw the following posted on Google Groups and even though it's a joke, I think it has potential. I did make a few changes but the basic message has not been altered.
New eBay Buyer Incentive
As a result of feedback from our members, eBay has decided to implement a new Buyer Incentive Program which we hope will increase sales and add vibrancy to our marketplace. For every dollar a buyer spends, they will receive one minute of time with a prostitute.
EBay has hired a number of prostitutes who will offer their services to the lucky bidders. Buyers have the option of accumulating their minutes, or using them immediately. There are no costs to the buyers for the prostitution services, but the recipient must pay the shipping (air fare) for the prostitute to come to their home. Therefore, a buyer spending $180 on eBay will get 3 hours of prostitution services but may have to pay $300 or more for the air fare plus transportation fees for delivery and return to the airport.
EBay has also announced that there will be no handling fees for their prostitutes no matter how much they handle the buyer.
Will you be the first buyer to get screwed this year, compliments of eBay?
Official note: Buyers must provide their own condoms to prevent infections.
This is an official public service announcement from eBay
I really think this would work.
Blanche
Answer
BLANCHE!!!!!!!!
You......
A bottle of Windex......
A roll of paper towels.....
My monitor!
NOW!
(and you owe me a glass of Diet Coke too! )
There is one small problem with that idea.....
....they would be forced to promote it behind "the curtain"!