Question
http://www.intellectualwhores.com/masterladder.html
Have any of you ever read this?
It's pretty funny, and it is meant to be humorous, so don't take it too seriously(to those of you who get easily defensive and offended).
Here are a couple parts:
Sally: We are just going to be friends, OK?
Harry: Great, friends. It's the best thing...You realize, of course, that we can never be friends.
Sally: Why not?
Harry: What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape, or form - is that men and women can't be friends, because the sex part always gets in the way.
Sally: That's not true. I have a number of men friends and there is no sex involved.
Harry: No, you don't.
Sally: Yes, I do.
Harry: No, you don't.
Sally: Yes, I do.
Harry: You only think you do.
Sally: You're saying I'm having sex with these men without my knowledge?
Harry: No, what I'm saying is they all want to have sex with you.
Sally: They do not.
Harry: Do too.
Sally: They do not.
Harry: Do too.
Sally: How do you know?
Harry: Because no man can be friends with a woman that he finds attractive. He always wants to have sex with her.
Sally: So you're saying that a man can be friends with a woman he finds unattractive.
Harry: No, you pretty much want to nail them, too.
Sally: What if they don't want to have sex with you?
Harry: Doesn't matter, because the sex thing is already out there, so the friendship is ultimately doomed, and that is the end of the story.IF A MAN FINDS YOU ATTRACTIVE YOU CANNOT BE FRIENDS
Many women want to argue this point and say things like " I have lots of guy friends." Maybe. There are exactly 3 cases Intellectual Whores has identified whereby a guy and a girl can be friends:
1. The guy is gay
2. The guy does not find you attractive.
3. The guy already has a woman much higher than you on the ladder
Even Nietzsche knew this. Most guys know this intuitively. Most girls doubt. I have a challenge for all of you girls who still doubt. Pick a guy who does not meet any of the criterion on the above list that you think is your friend. Then ask yourself this question: If you were both alone at his place one night, and you excused yourself to the bathroom and came out naked and asked him to have sex with you would he:
1. Tell you he doesn't want to risk the beautiful friendship you have created with messy physical entanglements.
2. Comply
Remember this only works if you are honest with yourself. Number one is of course something that guys hear all the time. Intellectual Whores refers to it as the Kiss of Death. It is more likely that he will jump you eagerly.
As to the first point, that of money. Well most guys know that women dig guys with money. Would Donald Trump be john teshing models if he wasn't rich? That question is rhetorical. Now I don't even believe this is wrong, I think it is just nature. But I also think women who are this way (and it is almost all of you) should be honest and admit that they are basically whores, and stop saying bad things about the so-called "actual whores" who are just trying to earn an honest living.
Most women read this and say something like, "Well I'm not the average woman because..blah...blah...not true...blah blah...my boyfriend/lover/husband/masseuse was poor...blah...blah."
If you thought something like this you are very likely the average woman. If you read it and went "Hmmm..." and then you went back to doing physics, then you have a case.
Looks are not to be discounted. I see many girls revert to about a seventh grade emotional level when they see some guy at the club, or some guy from a crappy movie. I think everyone has seen this phenomena, and it seems to have become an alarming trend in women of increasing age.
The attraction category is broken down further in the next section. This is a change from previous versions of the ladder theory that included looks here instead of attraction. I feel this is a more accurate depiction, as evidenced by experiment and peer review.
The last 10% was my effort to give women the benefit of the doubt. A common question men ask of women is "Tell me what you want in a man?", which is like asking how many guys she's slept with, an invitation to be lied to. Because she'll almost invariably answer with some combination of
* sense of humor
* intelligence
* sensitivity
* emotional stability
As far as I can tell this is mostly rubbish. But in an effort to be fair I have included this, since there seem to be a few rare cases of this. Just none that I have ever seen.
Another thing to watch out for is the code words women use. Here is a translation guide for dealing with women.
Says: I want a man who is motivated and has goals.
Means: I want a rich man
Says: I want a man who knows how to treat a woman.
Means: I want a rich man
Says: He's from a really good family.
Means: He's from a really rich family.
I'm sure you get the point. Let's move on.
Scenario 3: A girl says any of the following to you:
* "You're like a brother to me"
* "You're like a big teddy bear"
* "I feel like I can talk to you about anything"
* "You're so nice"
* "Can you help me with my homework"
Ladder Theory Explanation: You are on the friends ladder. So Sorry.
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=/ i must agree with the first qoutation o_o my bf told me the same exact thing o_o
its sad =/
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hahahaha i'm not a guy but this is funny.
Most men out there probably do have sex on their minds when meeting a new female friend, especially if she's attractive. I'm sure they wouldn't mind having sex with herr haha.
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ahaha that was funny. and so true too (y) !
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(IMG:style_emoticons/default/mellow.gif)
... that "i have many guy friends" thingy is...
...damn they're so true T.T;;;
majority of them all are true hahahah xD
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hahahahhhaha these were very entertaining to read
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indeed very entertaining and interesting, but i'm not sure if all of them are really true.
the sex part... i do agree it's true. even my male friend admits that if he sees an attractive female, he'd wish he has sex with her too. lol.... well, i guess the male's mind has 90% of it being comprised of sex sex sex more sex (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)
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I agree. Guys cannot be friends with Girls because in the end they start to like you.
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Thats soo true.. haha =o
all the girls that i met.. ive daydreamed of having it with them at least once.. hah
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LOL.
Another thing to watch out for is the code words women use. Here is a translation guide for dealing with women.
Says: I want a man who is motivated and has goals.
Means: I want a rich man
Says: I want a man who knows how to treat a woman.
Means: I want a rich man
Says: He's from a really good family.
Means: He's from a really rich family.
I'm sure you get the point. Let's move on.Haha, gold diggers.
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wow....
Another thing to watch out for is the code words women use. Here is a translation guide for dealing with women.
Says: I want a man who is motivated and has goals.
Means: I want a rich man
Says: I want a man who knows how to treat a woman.
Means: I want a rich man
Says: He's from a really good family.
Means: He's from a really rich family.
I'm sure you get the point. Let's move on.
MUAHAHAHAHHAHAH
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IW Glossary of Terms
Kiss of Death -- A friends speech ending in a hurtling trip to the Abyss. Specifically when a woman tells you something along the lines of "I think of you as a friend." It always results in a rejection of some sort.
B_h -- 99.999% of women. Note for men: I know they are. Note to women: yes, you are in this group. More accurately it is a woman who is not honest about why she won't sleep with you. Or sometimes, just a woman who won't sleep with you. And of course women who won't admit the basic truth of Ladder Theory.
God -- Something you should profess belief in if you think it will help you bang some pinkberry.
Outlaw Biker -- The prototype of everything women say they don't want but really do. And you will know him by his forearm tattoo, 'street smarts,' weed connection, domestic violence convictions, and the fact that the women you are an intellectual whore to are always complaining about him to you before they go off to f_k him, or leave you in a bar to go home with him.
Intellectual Whore -- This is defined here
Intellectual Pimp -- The woman that a man is an intellectual whore to.
bubble gum -- 99.999% of men. Note to women: I know they are. Note to men: I know you aren't really, and that it's just an act to get women. Essentially it is
a man who acts like a man.
Sesquipedalian -- a really cool word. It means long-winded, polysyllabic, or verbose. See the word describes itself...isn't that neat?
(IMG:http://www.intellectualwhores.com/images/disparity.jpg) Notice that Bob has Jane very low while Bob is very high on Jane's ladder. He is most likely rich and she is most likely ugly. Anyhow this is a classic case of disparity. If we connect the two points we can make a right triangle. The resulting hypotenuse "c" is the magnitude of the disparity.
LMFAO
edit: for some reason his logic reminds me of HaHa vs a girl on dangyunhaji
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the last one, definitely true. hahahaha
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hahhahahahhas
'guys cant be friends with girks that kinda sucks
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Haha. Iono. That's funny yet it's kinda depressing. I'm not sure if I agree or not. I do but half of me doesn't. >.<!
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haha it may have been meant to be humorous
but i found alot of it true (IMG:style_emoticons/default/biggrin.gif)
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oomgggggggg i gave up half way... too much to read O______o
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this is funny but kinda sad (IMG:style_emoticons/default/mellow.gif) lol !
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One more way you can be friends with a guy without the sex thing in the way; they're freaking related to you.
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^^ I wouldn't be so sure bout that. hahaha Incest does exist.